My dear Heartbreaker,
I am so thankful that I have healed from the most painfully beautiful experience I have learned from you. Thank you for breaking me open through my heart so that I am able to live my life more with my feelings, rather than solely by my head.
Before you broke my heart, I would logically think my life out to its boredom and talk myself out of experiences that would risk me living - living in a way of feeling my life.
With you - I allowed myself to dream, to hope, to feel. To then sleep, to lose faith, to go numb.
I knew I should not be in love with you, and probably would not be at some point. It was like you were there in my world to stand as a figure that I needed to set myself up for all these expectations, to fall really hard and bump my heart awake. It was never your fault - it was me.
I led myself down the path of my own heartbreak because I thought you would be "the one" - my knight in shining armor, the one to save me from myself, the one to complete me.
By not being these things for me, I learned to be these things for me.
I didn't lay in my puddle of tears as a damsel in distress needing to be saved - I rose out of my tearfully-soiled gown, and found my own armor to complete myself in becoming whole.
Thank you for not choosing me, for it had me choose myself.
With LOVE. Always,
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